Category: The Fast Food Critic

[Note: Some call them Peppermint Oreos and that may be technically correct, but Candy Cane Oreos are just regular Oreos with the cream as half red/half white.] So many specialty Holiday Oreos, but only one can rain supreme… Candy Cane Oreos…Definitely a less bold experience than the limited-edition watermelon Oreos released in the summer (green…

Another example in meaningless adjectives appealing to our subconscious nature Arby’s new “Smokehouse Brisket Sandwich” is neither from a smokehouse nor true brisket, although it is technically a sandwich. More and more fast food chains are throwing in mouthwatering adjectives like “Asiago,” “garden,” or “fresh,” to sell the same damn chicken sandwich they’ve always been…

“What do M&Ms have to do with fast food?”–New readers might say if they are unfamiliar with The Fast Food Critic’s insistence on reviewing different types of food that’s bad for you. It’s not all KFC buffets and Pizza Hut double-decker pepperoni cheese crust folks. It’s October time, and that means we’re going to be…

A continuation of Minnesota’s State Fair foods review…   A five dollar glass of lemonade…Not so much unhealthy as it is “What the fuck am I paying five dollars for when this cost them a nickel to make?” There’s insane mark-up (theater popcorn), and then there’s wallet rape. Grade for taste: B…Heart Attack O-Meter: 1…

The “Part 1” of that title is either a threat or a promise depending on your perspective on nasty, greasy, unhygienic things, but enough about the people of rural Minnesota who showed up in droves for the fair…Recently, I had the pleasure/displeasure of sampling some of the worst calorie bombs around at the Minnesota State…

For a limited time only, Oreo is releasing these beauties, which use a golden (vanilla wafer) oreo cookie instead of a chocolate one and a pink and green filling twisted into the shape of the inside of a watermelon. While You’re Eating Them: They’re basically a Starburst sandwiched in-between two Teddy Grahams. After You’re Done:…

Ordinarily the Fast Food Critic talks about greasy lard burgers or the best ways to kill yourself by eating some scummy new “Pizza” from Pizza Hut, but I decided to take a different approach today. I wanted to recommend the single best food documentary I’ve ever seen. It’s not a “Don’t eat this!” documentary (although…

Welp, for those that didn’t believe me before, we now have proof that sodas (and even diet sodas) are linked to depression. Now I know, I know, the study “isn’t conclusive,” but when are they ever? Right now, if you were to go on Yahoo’s front page or just do a little searching, you’d find…

Note: This isn’t from a chain, and I can’t really even remember the name of the place I tried it from. Needless to say, it might be hard to find if you actually live in Alabama, although I suspect this pizza would be really popular there, it’s carbs on carbs on carbs. “The Baked Potato…

The long-awaited return of The Fast Food Critic brings out the culinary “style” with an actual sit-down restaurant. But, as with all of Fat Ass America’s favorite sit-down restaurants, you can still eat like obesity’s going out of style. See, The Cheesecake Factory may be a faux-classy chain restaurant with an “upscale” decorum, but it…

I’ll keep this article short and (not-so) sweet since it’s a pretty straightforward premise within it. In fact, if you’ve read the title, you pretty much get the gist. If you’ve ever read any Fast Food Critic postings before, you can probably guess my reasoning. You see, I enjoy watching the Olympics (even on NBC’s…