Farmer John lived on a quiet rural highway. But as time went by, the traffic slowly built up and became so heavy and so fast that his chickens were being run over at a rate of three to six a day. So one day Farmer John called the local police station and said, “You’ve got…
Category: Mindless Mondays
Movie Review: Contagion, Call the Irony Police Because I Caught a Cold In the Theater
Although none of the movies I’m reviewing today are exactly bad (Warrior, Straw Dogs, and Drive do have their occasional moments), Contagion is the only one I would recommend without hesitation. The others are in between a C and a B-, but Contagion is a solid B+ right down the middle and is one of…
Movie Reviews: Drive
This is a tough movie to review as it keeps changing as you’re watching it. What starts out as a great, realistic movie about a getaway driver in L.A. then morphs into a relationship movie between that driver and his married next door neighbor. Just when you’re getting used to that movie, it then morphs…
Movie Review: Straw Dogs
Much like Warrior, this remake of a vastly superior 1970’s Sam Peckinpah movie was D.O.A. at the box office when it opened last weekend. Unlike Warrior, it makes perfect sense that nobody watched it. I mean, you really lose either way with this one. On the one hand, it’s a remake of a Sam Peckinpah…
Movie Review: Warrior
This movie has been out for two weeks and has yet to make any sort of an impact so I figure I’ll keep this brief…Warrior (for all 99% of the country that hasn’t seen it or heard of it) is a mixed martial arts movie. It hopes to be for this sport what Rocky was…
Entertainment Editorial: In the Audience for Anderson Cooper’s New Show
So I got to be in the audience for the first episode of Anderson Cooper’s new daytime talk show last Friday. [It aired today even though it was filmed last Friday afternoon.] And I thought it might be somewhat interesting to list some observations about the experience for anyone who hasn’t had the (dis)pleasure of…
Mom Jokes: The Veterinarian
One Sunday, in counting the money in the weekly offering, the pastor of a small church found a pink envelope containing $1,000. It happened again the next week! The following Sunday, he watched as the offering was collected and saw an elderly woman put the distinctive pink envelope on the plate. This went on…
Monday Morning Movie Review: The Whistleblower
After independent films too broad (The Guard) and perhaps too small (Higher Ground) comes this just right film about a real life Whistleblower. It stars Rachel Weisz as a Nebraska cop who went to work for a private defense contractor working with the United Nations to rebuild Bosnia’s police force after their civil war. Once…
Movie Review: Higher Ground
This complicated, interesting-if-not-satisfyng indie movie is directed by and stars Vera Farminga as an evangelical Christian struggling with her faith after a long period of drinking the Kool Aid. This is one of those indies that lives in the small moments (a slight glance of frustration here, a tiny moment of displeasure there) that slightly…
Movie Review: The Guard
This indie dud came and went last month with so-so reviews and box office, but I can’t say I’d recommend it to anyone looking to escape the big budget, brain dead summer fare. This movie (about Brendan Gleeson’s “unorthodox” Irish cop getting paired up with Don Cheadle’s straight laced FBI agent to stop a drug…
TV Review(s): Series Finales of Rescue Me and Entourage
Two once edgy cable comedy-dramas (although Entourage was supposed to be a straight comedy, Rescue Me was often funnier) crawled to a close last week after 8 years on the air. Of course I would love to kick the skeletons of Rescue Me and Entourage, two shows long past their peak and that both started…
Monday Morning Movie Reviewer: A Good Old Fashioned Orgy
The title mostly says it all. This movie is about Jason Sudekis trying to get all his friends together to perform, you guessed it, a good old fashioned orgy. It’s got some sporadically funny parts, but mostly this is a somewhat good film to watch in about a year when it’s on HBO (or, more…
Monday Morning Movie Reviewer: Colombiana
Colombiana is a strange movie. Not strange in terms of content–it’s standard revenge film stuff–but strange in that I KNOW it is “technically” the worst movie I’m reviewing today, but I actually would recommend this before My Idiot Brother or Fright Night. You won’t see a thing you haven’t seen before in this (except exactly…