This movie sucks. What Works: Supposedly, this movie is based on a true story, and I guess that alone makes it more interesting than the typical Jason Statham flick. Still, the trade-off for that is you have to live in the movie’s real-life time of the early 80’s and all the typical, terrible mustaches and…
Category: Mindless Mondays
Mom Jokes: Grandparent’s Answering Machine
Good morning. . . . At present we are not at home but, please Leave your message after you hear the beep. If you are one of our children, press 1 and then select the option from 1 to 5 in order of “birth order” so we know who it is. If you need us…
Monday Morning Movie Reviews: Moneyball, Very Good
As crappy as “What’s Your Number?” is there was a movie this weekend that gave me hope that the future of movies is not lost. I saw Moneyball and (even though I’m not a baseball or even a sports fan whatsoever) consider it easily one of the best sports based movies I’ve seen in several…
Movie Review: What’s Your Number?, Strong Contender For Worst Movie of the Year
“What’s Your Number?” is only exceptional in that it is the worst movie I’ve seen in at least three month (at least since Bad Teacher). In fact, it is a very strong contender for worst movie of the year. Now, longtime readers will ask “But you’ve reviewed Big Momma’s House 3 and Gnomeo and Juliet?”…
TV Reviews of Some New Fall Shows, and Some Very Old Ones
I sore a blood oath (minus the blood) that I would bring loyal readers reviews of all the new Fall shows. So far I’ve reviewed the first 19 premieres to debut, and today bring reviews of “Suburgatory” and “How to Be a Gentleman.” But since two paragraph long reviews of those shows probably aren’t enough,…
Mom Jokes: The Lecture
An elderly man is stopped by the police around 1 am. and is asked where he is going at this time of night. The man replies, “I am going to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body.” The officer then asks, “Really? Who is giving that lecture at this…
Entertainment Editorial: Is George Clooney the King of Fall?
So about once every three years there seems to be a Will Smith movie that opens on the 4th of July (Independence Day, Men in Black, Hancock, etc.) and it happens enough that his nickname has become “King of the 4th of July.” Which begs the question: What other time periods do movie stars “own?”…
TV Reviews: Reviewing 19 of the New Fall Shows
Today I go for a record number of reviews on the site as I attempt to review all 17 of the broadcast TV (that’s Fox, ABC, CBS, for about another two years NBC, and the why-the-hell-not CW) pilots that have aired so far. I have seen EVERY pilot that has aired so far (appreciate my…
Mom Joke: Chickens
Farmer John lived on a quiet rural highway. But as time went by, the traffic slowly built up and became so heavy and so fast that his chickens were being run over at a rate of three to six a day. So one day Farmer John called the local police station and said, “You’ve got…
Movie Review: Contagion, Call the Irony Police Because I Caught a Cold In the Theater
Although none of the movies I’m reviewing today are exactly bad (Warrior, Straw Dogs, and Drive do have their occasional moments), Contagion is the only one I would recommend without hesitation. The others are in between a C and a B-, but Contagion is a solid B+ right down the middle and is one of…
Movie Reviews: Drive
This is a tough movie to review as it keeps changing as you’re watching it. What starts out as a great, realistic movie about a getaway driver in L.A. then morphs into a relationship movie between that driver and his married next door neighbor. Just when you’re getting used to that movie, it then morphs…
Movie Review: Straw Dogs
Much like Warrior, this remake of a vastly superior 1970’s Sam Peckinpah movie was D.O.A. at the box office when it opened last weekend. Unlike Warrior, it makes perfect sense that nobody watched it. I mean, you really lose either way with this one. On the one hand, it’s a remake of a Sam Peckinpah…
Movie Review: Warrior
This movie has been out for two weeks and has yet to make any sort of an impact so I figure I’ll keep this brief…Warrior (for all 99% of the country that hasn’t seen it or heard of it) is a mixed martial arts movie. It hopes to be for this sport what Rocky was…