Partial Caveat: This could easily go into Sunday’s Sermons (and was supposed to originally) but if I wait until Sunday to post it, who knows if unions will even still be around. Plus, this section is where I post something I value every week, and for me the issue of unions is about as close to…
Author: Alabama Liberal
Petty Issues
There is a circle of hell that killers go to, below it is where child rapists go, and below that is where the Bravo executive responsible for the Real Housewives franchise can expect a spot. In Washington Tom Delay traded political favors for money. In prison Tom Delay trades money to keep from giving sexual…
Now What? (Life Post-Grad): There’s a New Lower Class and it’s Called Young People or I think I’m Turning East Indian
In the endless garbage bin of catchy 1980’s music that doesn’t hold up well is a song by The Vapors called “Turning Japanese,” with the totally rad lyric young people used to sing, “I think I’m turning Japanese.” A generation of young people today might sing “I Think I’m Turning East Indian,” in that they…
Working Class Economist: The Underwater Degree
This feature could just as easily be on Now What? but today I want to cover Underwater Degrees. Most of you may have heard the term “Underwater Mortgage” used to describe houses that are in more mortgage debt than they will ever be worth. I’ve coined the phrase Underwater Degrees to refer to degrees that…
The Fast Food Critic: I have a near death experience with the 5 Dollar Foot Long
Today’s review was supposed to be about how foods you think of as healthy can be deceptive, because Subway has centered their entire brand around the idea that lard asses can lose weight by eating food measured in feet. I deliberately picked what might be the unhealthiest sub on their menu to review, The Chicken…
Red State Vs. Blue State: AL Vs. The Evil Russian Challenger, Eat Your Heart out Rocky IV
Today I debate a Russian Spy, I mean, a nice young man (Artem Joukov) who immigrated to America when he was three but somehow fell in with a bad crowd of strict Christian conservatives Brody: Hi, thanks for coming on the site. It’s great to have an old friend like this. Artem: It is good…
Down & Out in Bumblefuck: The Rural News
This week on Alabama Liberal is all about religion, so I thought I’d recommend some great Netflix films I’d stumbled across that talk about just that. There isn’t going to be a whole lot I can add to the topic—one of America’s favorites—but these films just might: Waiting for Armageddon: A great, brisk film detailing…
Big Momma’s House 3, because We Just Didn’t Get Enough Fat Black Lady Jokes in the First Two
This movie sucks. What Works: lol What Doesn’t: From the opening credits to the music video ending this movie is a racist, sexist train wreck. Everything from every white male character being a villain or sleaze bag to the tired stereotype that the scariest thing on the planet is a fat, angry black woman (Big…
TV Review of MTV’s Skins, as Forced and Awkward as Teen Sex
In the above review of The Mechanic, I speculate that maybe if teenagers were having more sex, they would be less violent. [Christian conservatives can come on here and jump down my throat if they want to but young males getting it on the regular typically don’t storm their schools looking for random people to…
The Mechanic’s Gun Love
Remember all that talk (for about five minutes) post-Tucson shooting that maybe Hollywood movies project an image of violence too readily to young men? The conversation was even more halfhearted than the gun control debate where people mentioned it might be okay if people aren’t allowed to buy assault weapons, and then dropped it by…
Just Go With It…or Don’t, Boycott this Excuse for Adam Sandler to go on Vacation
Only a week after I mentioned Adam Sandler’s great, angry work in the underappreciated film Funny People, I watch the stink bomb Just Go with It. This week is morality week here on Alabama Liberal, and if Hollywood loves violence (The Mechanic) and mocking fat black women (Big Momma’s House), then they also love lazy,…
Why The Social Network Should Beat The King’s Speech for Best Picture
It’s that time of year again. For a couple dozen movies to be nominated in Oscar’s big races and for only a handful to really win big. For the last decade the Oscars have been about as lively as snail shit mostly because from December until early February so many groups have their awards first…
Mom Jokes, resending the best joke my mom emailed me last week:
A woman walks into a bridal shop to pick out a wedding dress for her fourth wedding. She tells the store clerk she wants a white wedding gown. The store clerk, delicately, tries to inform her that white wedding dresses are more for virgins than women on their fourth marriage. The woman is furious and…