A few decades ago Dave Thomas of Wendy’s fame starred in commercials not just to unnerve us with his resemblance to a sex offender, but to ask his fast food competition “Where’s the beef?” Of course Dave later died of a heart attack from asking that question one too many times while gorging Wendy’s triple…
Author: Alabama Liberal
Red State vs. Blue State: AL vs. Anti-Union Andy, Round 2
I’ll post the last comment from last week as a refresher of where we left off, the rest is the middle section of our debate. We join this debate already in progress… Brody: Tax cuts take away from the state budget. Lowering taxes on the wealthy and corporations inside a state insures states won’t have…
Down & Out in Bumblefuck: The Rural News
Today I’d like to talk about Charlie Sheen. I’m just fucking with you, I’d like to talk about poor people in third world countries…ha, and you thought today was going to be fun! No, I’d like to speak of the real Bumblefucks out there: third world nations and the news media that doesn’t care about…
Monday Morning Movie Reviewer: The Adjustment Bureau, Best Movie of 2011…So Far
So there I was ready to slam this movie. I already had the headline (Adjustment Bureau…adjust your expectations), but then it surprised me by being good almost from the first five minutes. Then it surprised me by being really good. Now saying this movie is the best I’ve seen this year is a bit of…
Monday Morning Movie Review: Rango Finds the Beauty in Ugly
I don’t know what’s in the water this week but just like I enjoyed The Adjustment Bureau I also found Rango to be better than almost any film I had seen this year. This strange, beautiful film showed me something I didn’t even know was allowed in kid’s films anymore: ugliness. Not bad ugliness, but…
TV Review: Justified Saves Wednesday Nights
Depending on who you are different nights of the week will be considered good for TV. For me Tuesday night—which has a week high of six shows I watch from so-so programmers like V and No Ordinary Family to quietly excellent shows like Parenthood, The Good Wife, Southland, and Lights Out—is the best night of…
Entertainment Editorial: Should We Give The Farrelly Brothers a Permanent Pass?
The new movie Hall Pass pretty much came and went the weekend before last opening to a disappointing 13 million (initially expected to open at about 20 million) and unlikely to do much better this last weekend. Something that struck me in the previews was that they hardly mentioned the film was directed by the…
Mom Jokes: Resending the Best Joke My Mom Sent to Me Last Week
A Wish To Live Forever I met a fairy today that said she would grant me one wish. “I want to live forever,” I said. “Sorry,” said the fairy, “I’m not allowed to grant wishes like that!” “Fine,” I said, “then I want to die after Wisconsin’s Congress gets their heads out of their asses!” “You…
Sunday’s Sermons: I Pose as a Black Woman on the Internet
I don’t think one can ever really know what it’s like to be another person. I might utterly despise someone like former President Bush, but I really don’t know what it’s like to be him. That being said, it’s very true that he absolutely doesn’t know what it’s like to be me, poor, or a…
Bubba’s Sex Tips for a Seductive Evening: Tip 4: Picking Up Chicks at Church, Not Just For Catholic Priests Anymore
If you live in say, Los Angeles, there are roughly 500,000 places you can expect to meet women. You could go to a coffee shop (rural Alabama counties have few), you could go to a club (rural Alabama has a few bars…until they’re closed down), you could go to a bookstore (none here), etc. In…
Interviews with the Invisible: The Newspaper Reporter
Today I interview Cliff McCollum, the former head of the Auburn College Democrats and all around sharp guy who is now a part of the ultimate shrinking, invisible profession: he’s a newspaper reporter. I sat down to talk with him about the state of newspapers, if reality TV’s “Anybody can be a star” mentality has…
R.I.P “Liberal” Media (or Why the Media Won’t Call Scott Walker a Fascist But Will Call Obama a Socialist)
It’s time to call a time of death on something that may never have existed in the first place: the liberal media. I’m not sure the exact date to put on the tombstone for either birth (of course at one time the media was as doctored and corporatized by big business as it is now) or…
Petty Issues Week 4
And they wonder why America is so fat: You can’t have a commercial with a Dr. Pepper, Doritos, McDonald’s, etc. commercial. When’s the last time you saw a fucking commercial for lettuce? I’ve lost a little weight since the beginning of the year through a diet of spontaneous vomitting after watching John Boehner cry about…