William Shakespeare. Oscar Wilde. Sarah Palin. Bubba from Bubba’s Sex Tips. All of these people have coined words. The first two coined countless phrases in their official capacity as all around witty fucks. Palin has coined several phrases by using the wrong word in a twitter feed and instead of admitting a typo, saying she invented a new word in her official capacity as national idiot. Now Bubba (yes, third person is how I will now be addressed in my new capacity for phrase making) is getting in on the action in his official capacity as village drunk.
The word is Ruralstream. Because first there is what’s hip and always ahead of the pack or trendy. Then there is mainstream or something that has been so widely embraced Faux News is only a few weeks from reporting about it. Then comes Ruralstream. This means something has been mainstream for about five years, is half dead, and has finally come to rural Alabama. Ruralstream is different than a cult hit in that it isn’t that the rest of the world has taken a pass on something and then you embrace it as a masterpiece (i.e. a cult hit). It is something the rest of the world embraced a long time ago and now it’s getting big in the county limits (i.e. online dating).
Whenever you see a commercial for Match.com or its control freak cousin EHarmony—which, like an overbearing mother, doesn’t let you pick your own matches, it sends you your own matches damnit! And they’d better be good enough!—usually a young, yuppyish couple is sitting in a distinctly urban setting. They might be walking around the beaming nightlife of an alive New York city block, exchanging awkward small talk (Sample: “Yeah so, I love John Hughes movies” “Oh yeah, me too, they’re like, my favorite”) that makes online dating look like low key fun.
What those commercials definitely don’t show is a guy sitting at the back table at Cracker Barrel across from a redneck woman with three kids and an oxycodone addiction. [Sample: “You smoke?” “No, not really” Then 45 minutes of silence]. I’m not trying to say you definitely won’t meet anyone on these sites, just that it—like most things—is more difficult in Alabama. Doing a quick search even in someplace like Segregation City, I mean, Atlanta shows a little bit more variety than a more rural area an hour away from Atlanta where you might only find recently divorced single moms on their third go round or fake profiles asking you to check out their webcam.
Of course I’m not knocking online dating in general, because I do think it works. Even on the internet, there’s still that first great rush you get seeing someone obviously attractive, obviously smart, and obviously perfect you. She likes you, you like her, and it just takes off from there…until she asks you to be buy Hoodia or penis enlargement pills because it’s a spam profile. So maybe it’s just a little different than in person.
I tried it but didn’t have much luck. I’ve known other people to really hit it off that way though
I had great luck and met someone online. I don’t know if it works for eevryone but it definitely worked for me.
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