Note from last week: I now believe it was NOT subway that made me sick. So apologies Subway, but that sandwich was still disgusting and unhealthy.
Anyway, this week is media issues week and there is no better food to cover than Dominos pizza which last year launched the rarest marketing campaign of all: commercials talking about how awful their product is. You might remember seeing these TV spots where customers complained Dominoes pizza tasted like ketchup soaked cardboard, had no flavor, and the cheese was scarcely better than a damn wash cloth. Then Dominos begged you (like a deadbeat husband you’re about to leave) to “give them another shot” with a revamped pizza that was supposedly better because the marina sauce now had actual flavor.
Well, just like Chris Brown and Ike Turner are never really going to change, so too you probably shouldn’t give Dominos another chance. I’ll admit that I’m one of the few who actually liked the pizza before the change, and I pretty much like it now. It might be a 5 or 7 percent improvement difference, but if you didn’t like Dominos before you probably won’t now.
While You’re Eating It: Actually pretty good, probably the most enjoyable food I’ve reviewed so far…oh wait, grease backlash is kicking in. I’m on my 4th slice and should stop…but still haven’t three later.
After You’re Done: Bloated, stuffed, drowning in a river of saturated fat…hope there’s some good TV on tonight because I’m not doing anything else.
Impotence Level: Oh…only a mere 36 hours or so.
Heart Attacks on a scale of 1 to 5 heart attacks: Well if you eat one slice (which no one does) I would say 1 heart attack, but if you eat the whole pizza (as I did) I would recommend a minor angioplasty the day after.
How can you eat this stuff! I want to see you promote healthier food. And give them a negative heart attack rating. And you Impotence level will obviously become amazing! Start with oyster :) or avocado salad.
Its like you read my mind! You appear to know so much about this, like you wrote the book in it or something. I think that you could do with a few pics to drive the message home a bit, but instead of that, this is fantastic blog. An excellent read. I will definitely be back.
Hello.This article was really interesting, particularly since I was searching for thoughts on this matter last Thursday.
Thank you for this article. Waiting for next one.
I ate their pizza today for the first time since the change and I loved it. Yes the food was still a bit greasy, but it is a pizza. I recommend a second oppinion.