This movie sucks. What Works: Supposedly, this movie is based on a true story, and I guess that alone makes it more interesting than the typical Jason Statham flick. Still, the trade-off for that is you have to live in the movie’s real-life time of the early 80’s and all the typical, terrible mustaches and…
Mom Jokes: Grandparent’s Answering Machine
Good morning. . . . At present we are not at home but, please Leave your message after you hear the beep. If you are one of our children, press 1 and then select the option from 1 to 5 in order of “birth order” so we know who it is. If you need us…
Larger Editorial: Inside The Wall Street Protests
I guess now we finally know what to do to get the media to cover liberal protests (unlike their deadbeat duties in NOT covering the Wisconsin protests). Just pitch them outside Wall Street and then the Wall Street-run media will have no choice but to cover them. They’re now covering this particular protest because it’s…
Petty Issues
Andy Rooney said goodbye on 60 Minutes last week, shocking those of us who thought he was already dead. R.E.M. announced they were breaking up last week, shocking those of us who thought–oh, stop me if you’ve heard this one… I can’t believe the remarkably unappealing Dolphin Tale (it’s pretty rare I won’t even go…
Working Class Economist: How To Be a Millionaire…
…by 60. Okay, so maybe that’s cheating a little bit as no one wants to wait that long. Well, honestly that’s too bad. If you want my list of how to become a millionaire in a month, here it is…1. Buy a winning a lottery ticket, 2. Go back to the fetus stage of your…
The Fast Food Critic: Chipotle Burritos
Today I review something that really suffers from exaggerated expectations. On the one hand, Chipotle burritos do taste pretty good…on the other hand they DON’T taste ten dollars good (Moe’s offers the exact same burrito for less plus you get chips). Also on the other hand, is minimal taste satisfaction enough to counteract the stat…
Monday Morning Movie Reviews: Moneyball, Very Good
As crappy as “What’s Your Number?” is there was a movie this weekend that gave me hope that the future of movies is not lost. I saw Moneyball and (even though I’m not a baseball or even a sports fan whatsoever) consider it easily one of the best sports based movies I’ve seen in several…
Movie Review: What’s Your Number?, Strong Contender For Worst Movie of the Year
“What’s Your Number?” is only exceptional in that it is the worst movie I’ve seen in at least three month (at least since Bad Teacher). In fact, it is a very strong contender for worst movie of the year. Now, longtime readers will ask “But you’ve reviewed Big Momma’s House 3 and Gnomeo and Juliet?”…
TV Reviews of Some New Fall Shows, and Some Very Old Ones
I sore a blood oath (minus the blood) that I would bring loyal readers reviews of all the new Fall shows. So far I’ve reviewed the first 19 premieres to debut, and today bring reviews of “Suburgatory” and “How to Be a Gentleman.” But since two paragraph long reviews of those shows probably aren’t enough,…
Mom Jokes: The Lecture
An elderly man is stopped by the police around 1 am. and is asked where he is going at this time of night. The man replies, “I am going to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body.” The officer then asks, “Really? Who is giving that lecture at this…
Larger Editorial: Why Michelle Bachmann is a Red Herring to Distract From Rick Perry
Of all the presidential candidates this year or the last fifty years, I don’t think there’s been a single one to be mocked as extensively as Michelle Bachmann (keep in mind that Sarah Palin isn’t actually a candidate for anything but media whore). And sure, I don’t think much of her myself, which is the…
Petty Issues
There’s a curious lack of Republican debates this week. I was getting kind-of lazy counting on a shit avalanche of politicians saying embarrassing things every week. It’s a little weird to watch the new ABC show Suburgatory (which ruthlessly parodies the suburbs) right before watching Modern Family (which ruthlessly enforces everything that’s wrong with the…
Working Class Economist: If You Like Social Security and Medicare, VOTE Like You Do
I’ll keep this brief because maybe the big mistake plaguing liberal groups like MoveOn.org in their attempt to change people’s minds is that they talk too much. I mean, if you really don’t know which party is protecting Medicare and which party isn’t, then you probably aren’t willing to read seven paragraphs or even anything…