The pre-debate montage on NBC might as well say “brought to you by WWF” and a “let’s get ready to ruuuuumble!”
6:00–Savannah Guthrie tries to be even blander than usual, while Chuck Todd talks about competing visions of America in a way that makes Trump’s sound worse. I can’t wait to see Trump’s mean tweet about him during the first commerical break.
6:03–Andrea Mitchell is talking…for some reason.
6:05–Lester Holt introduces Hillary and Trump. Can’t wait to see how that introduction was biased towards Hillary…
6:06–First question “is about jobs.” I wish they would have opened with their opinions on too many Marvel movies.
6:08–Hillary “it’s good to be on stage with you tonight Donald.” The first real lie I think she’s ever told.
6:08–It takes Trump five seconds to bring up Mexico. No, not a racist at all.
6:10–By the second commercial break, the fact-checkers will be hospitalized for exhaustion.
6:11–Hillary came to play, as she’s hitting Trump first. Looks like no signs of repeating Obama’s 2012 sleepwalking through first Romney debate.
6:12–I’ll bet money Trump is only wearing a blue tie because Hillary (in between two ferns video) said he’d be wearing a “red power tie.”
6:14–Trump is sniffing a lot. Cocaine?
6:15–Trump called her “Secretary Clinton” which is correct, but said “is that okay? I want you to be happy.” Which looks more than a little odd.
6:17–Trump needed a “bump” tonight and I don’t mean Red Bull. “I just need some of that 80’s magic” [snorts]
6:17–Hillary talks about Green Jobs, and revolutionizing the economy. “That’s great Hillary, but what will you do to keep out Mexicans?”–what Trump fans are thinking.
6:18–Trump denies he said climate crisis is a hoax by China to slow our economy. But he absolutely did say that.
6:20–Inside look at Trump’s notecards “Mexico=bad” “Reagan=good” “China=bad” “tax cuts=good”
6:25–Trump seems to literally be complaining that Hillary has a plan to fight ISIS. “The generals wouldn’t like that.” Hillary: “At least I have a plan.” Trump: “No, you’re telling the enemy everything you want to do.” Uhhhh…what?
6:28–Hillary: “I feel like by tonight I’m going to be blamed for everything wrong in America.” Trump: “Why not?” Admission that he’s just throwing shit at the wall and seeing what sticks?
6:31–Trump says he’ll release his tax returns after a routine audit. He has been saying this since February primary debates.
6:33–Trump says he knows plenty of rich people who never get audited, but he does. Isn’t this an admission that he’s a crook?
6:35–Hillary “for forty years every presidential candidate has released their tax returns.” Exactly, but Trump pivots towards Hillary’s emails.
6:36–Hillary speculates as to why he won’t release his tax returns. Trump is clearly very nervous at this point, one of the few times he’s been totally silent during her time to speak.
6:39–Trump makes the case for infrastructure spending and bemoans our third-world airports, which is absolutely correct, but he has absolutely NO plan for infrastructure spending. NONE. He just blames Hillary, but she says he might be his fault for not paying taxes for years.
6:41–She brings up all the people he’s stiffed over his years as a business man. He has no real answer for this.
6:43–As they pivot to race, a recap of Trump’s business secrets: “smart” neglect of paying taxes, and don’t pay employees when it’s time to pay them.
6:45–Hillary and Trump seem very far apart on race issues…surprise, surprise. Also, ice cream is usually cold.
6:46–Hillary brings up police shootings. Trump proudly brags about police endorsements and mentions “law and order” more than anything to do with Civil Rights.
6:49–Trump “there’s some bad things going on, some really bad things.” This is as close to a policy proposal as we get in this answer.
6:50–Hillary doesn’t say it directly but basically accusses Trump of being a race-baiting politician.
6:53–Trump tells Lester Holt (a black man) he’s wrong about Stop and Frisk’s effects on the black community. “Whatever you say dude, whatever you say.”–What Lester is thinking.
6:55–Trump brings up Hillary’s “super predators” comment from 100 years ago. Be honest, would he have thought to use that if Bernie hadn’t used it a few months back?
6:57–Trump says politicians use the black community for votes, and when they get them they say “see you in four years.” That’s true, and the difference is that Trump isn’t even saying he’ll do anything for them now.
6:59–Lester Holt brings up Trump’s outrageous birther opinions for five years, and once again Trump tries to lay it on Hillary’s feet.
7:01–This debates increases my agnostic-side because if God was real, he would strike Trump dead for trying to put Birther-ism on Hillary.
7:02–Hillary tells a personal story about Obama being bothered by Trump’s birther-ism.
7:05–“Many, many people are saying Hillary kidnapped the Lindberg baby. I’m not the only one–many people, I’m not the one bringing it up.”
7:07–They pivot to cyber-security, but don’t cocky Hillary fans because Trump has been rumored to use a computer, so he’s pretty well qualified.
7:08–If Hillary was the one sniffing like this, the media would wonder if she was going to die next week or next month.
7:10–At 7:07 I made a joke, but Trump is one step ahead of me by literally saying his ten year old son has a computer. “He’s incredible with computers.” So clearly, Trump has a plan.
7:12–Hillary reminds the fact-checkers to do their job as Trump tries to lay the blame on everything from Iraq to ISIS on Hillary.
7:16–It’s tough to run against a guy who has no government experience because he can blame everything bad with the government on you.
7:19–Trump is giving a horrible, rambling answer that name-drops Sean Hannity a dozen times and Hillary has a face that says “all I have to do is stand here and let him talk.”
7:22–Trump strategy “say the name Sean Hannity 60 times an answer.” Hillary strategy “let him talk as much as possible.”
7:26–Trump “nuclear weapons are the single greatest threat to the planet, not global warming like you think.” Well, so far nuclear bombs have never wrecked New Orleans, NYC, or the Gulf of Mexico. They’ve also never caused an uptick in droughts, wildfires, or tornadoes.
7:32–They have not had a single commercial break in 90 minutes. When Trump says “Hillary does not have the stamina” that seems to contradict it.
7:33–Hillary says she withstood a congressional hearing for 11 hours and flew around the world as Secretary of State for 4 years. One of her best comebacks of the night.
7:35–As punishment for saying she doesn’t have “stamina” Hillary brings up Trump’s history of sexism.
7:37–Trump is asked whether or not he would support the result of this election even if he lost, but Lester has to ask it twice before Trump finally answers.
7:39–The debate is finally over, and I’m sure Lester Holt is going to go get a hard drink. As should America…