I came to Oliver Stone’s new movie with a different perspective than some of the audience, since I actually read Don Winslow’s book “Savages” on which this is based. The two projects aren’t all that different, but they differ in hundreds of small ways that add up (like the fact that Salma Hayek’s cartel head…
Category: Mindless Mondays
Movie Review: Red Lights
Another independent movie you’ve never heard of to go along with Beasts of the Southern Wild and To Rome with Love lol, and one even less worthy of your dollars. What Works: The movie is about two professors (Cillian Murphy and Sigourney Weaver) who tour the country debunking “supernatural phenomenon” but eventually run foul of…
Movie Review: Abraham Lincoln, Vampire Hunter
Alright so this movie’s kind-of stupid right? Problem is, it may not be stupid enough. The weirdest thing in this movie is that they play the story entirely straight, and there isn’t a drop of irony in having the 16th president of the United States swing a giant axe on top of a vampire’s skull. It’s…
Movie Review: Beasts of the Southern Wild
This is a really, really divisive film and you have to be a very specific kind-of audience to watch it and in a very specific kind-of mood to like it. It doesn’t have a “plot” so much as a loose story and how much you like it will probably depend on what you go to…
Movie Review: To Rome With Love
There are really two schools of critics when it comes to current-day Woody Allen. There are those who are just thankful the legend is still alive and still making roughly a movie a year (not unlike an auteur version of James Patterson). And there are those that think this approach has really, really caused the…
Mom Jokes: Bad Teacher
My son was kicked out of school for letting a girl give him a hand job. I said “Son, that’s three this year. You’d better stop before they don’t let you teach anywhere.” [In honor of Breaking Bad’s return.]
TV Review: Breaking Bad’s Final Season Premiere
The best show on Television (right now) is back and all is right with the world. Some fans (and non-fans) may have seen the season 5 posters of TV’s most complicated lead character ever, Walter White, sitting in a lab with mountains of cash and meth around him, and the tagline “All hail the king.”…
Entertainment Editorial: The 15 Best “Breaking Bad” Episodes
Well, it’s that time again. Time to get ready for another season of the best show on television, AMC’s Breaking Bad. In order to prepare both the uninitiated and the die-hard fans alike for the new season, I thought I’d list what I consider to be the 15 best episodes of the series so far….
Movie Review: Brave
How well you like this movie really comes down to whether you’re a fan of old-Disney princesses (everything from Cinderella to Pocahontas) or Pixar (everything from Ratatouille to Wall-E). Because this is definitely the most traditionally Disney movie that Pixar has ever made. It takes a reliably Disney formula (slightly tradition-breaking princess + slightly different…
Entertainment Editorial: Why Steven Soderbergh is The Best Director Alive
Anytime someone is willing to declare anything “the best” rather than “one of the best,” they open themselves up to quite a bit of criticism. You can practically feel people racing to the comments section to tell you you’re full of shit (if people on this site used the comments section), but who really wants…
Monday Morning Movie Reviewer: “Magic Mike,” Better Than You Might Think
Will gay men and straight women (the movie’s key demographic) enjoy this movie? They should. But will straight men dragged to this movie by their girlfriends or wives (like myself) enjoy this movie? Actually, they just might. It all falls down to three important factors 1. There is nearly as much female nudity as male…
Movie Review: Snow White and the Huntsman
Has everybody in America seen this movie already? Probably…AND the story is old as dirt, so at least I don’t have to worry about spoilers…but I don’t have to worry about them anyway since there’s not really anything to spoil for a story so old. What Works: In two words: Charlize Theron. She takes the…
Mom Jokes: Too Little, Too Late
On his death bed, a husband found himself calling for his wife. “I have to confess something to you, honey, before it’s too late.” “It’s fine,” his wife said. “You don’t have to confess anything.” “No, I do. I screwed your sister, your cousin, your best friend, your best friend’s sister, their mother, your female…