So apparently there were some true believers that thought the world should end today. Imagine the strange sensation of being disappointed to wake up today “We’re alive!…oh wait…well damn…”. I know I can just imagine there were a lot of heartbroken chicks out there. They’ve been told over and over again that their one true boyfriend Jesus is going to finally come back, and take them somewhere nice. Then, once again, they wake up this morning to find the sun rise and no Jesus. He’s promised them a special trip yet again, only to leave them stranded in ruralsville with the other heathens.
They just don’t get it. Were they not special enough? Did he perhaps take ANOTHER devoted follower he loved more like that floozy Jane who sings in the choir? You can almost hear the rationale “Well, I’m sure he’s got a good excuse for not showing up again.” That’s when you show up to assure them he DOESN’T.
We’ve all seen guys that seemingly live to talk trash about a girl’s boyfriend when he’s not around. They get her a dozen roses, that guy says “Only a dozen? Baby, I would have gotten you two dozen.” They take her to Vegas, that guy says “Vegas? I would take you to the real Paris.” If they brought her a gift wrapped unicorn carrying gold nuggets somehow that guy would say he could have brought a diamond studded rainbow. Then of course she eventually leaves her boyfriend for that guy talking trash, who is much worse, but by then it’s too late.
So the question is: How to do this with Jesus? On the negative side, all men are sorely lacking and unable to compete. On the plus side, they are, you know, human. So there’s that. Today, just go up to that religious zealot crying her eyes out about being alive and ask her to a movie. If she says “I can’t, the day’s not over, the rapture still might come.” You say “Honey, I love Jesus, I think he’s a great guy, really, but he’s not coming. However, Pirates of the Caribbean 15: Johnny Depp Needs a New Mansion is playing. I’ll even carry you on a real trip…maybe.”
The end is here, the end is here…oh wait, nevermind
Lol Nice!