Note: As anyone who’s ever checked out Alabama Liberal’s countdown of the year’s worst TV characters knows, this list doesn’t really gravitate towards bad characters on bad TV shows, and tries to focus on lousy characters who suck up time on otherwise good series. Of course, there’a a few exceptions to that you’ll probably be able to spot…
15. Worst All-Around Cast of Characters: “The Boys”…On Amazon’s overrated “Boys,” we have characters who repeatedly do things because the plot requires them to more than anything that feels natural for them in that moment. [I could list several dozen examples, but Soldier Boy being willing to kill his son Homelander merely because he’s “weak” is one, the myopically-obsessed Butcher prioritizing the life of a kid he doesn’t like over finally taking down Homelander is another, Homelander letting his son go at the end of season 2 over a flimsy “blackmail” video but ignoring that any of that is important in season 3 is yet another, and–of course–Homelander repeatedly refusing to kill a single one of the people that has made it their mission to end his life is a plot hole at this point.] It defies plausibility that all of “The Boys” are still alive, and is probably more symptomatic of a series that doesn’t know when to cut loose its deadweight (like Laz Alonzo’s perpetually screaming Mother’s Milk or Tomer Capone’s bland Frenchie).
14. Syril (Kyle Soller) on “Andor”…The fascist toad Syril is definitely a realistic character as a man who thinks he can use the “greatness” of the empire to bolster his own significance, but we already have a similar (and more intriguing) character doing that with Denise Gough’s Dedra. Too often, Syril’s scenes feel like time fillers so “Andor” can get to 12 episodes instead of a tighter 10-episode season. Syril’s “dogged determination” to bring in Cassian Andor just feels like a more pitiful echo of Dedra’s.
13. Amandine (Melia Kreiling) on “Mammals”…The very last scene of “Mammals” helps explain some of Amandine’s bizarre behavior, but the preceding 99% of the first season just shoehorns her into the role of narcissistic, faux-intellectual, phony Eurotrash trophy wife. There’s not an interesting or appealing scene she’s in, making it feel a little far-fetched that so many of the male characters on “Mammals” are willing to set their lives on fire to be with her.
12. John Dutton (Kevin Costner) on “Yellowstone”…It’s a testament to Costner’s subtle charisma that I actually feel conflicted about including this character on here. And yet, “Governor” Dutton is pretty much everything that’s wrong with contemporary politics: a wealthy grouch who cares little for his actual constituents and just wants to protect his own holdings. It’s repeated over and over again that John cares more about a few hundred wealthy ranchers than the city of Bozeman (who he treats with contempt) or the vast majority of Montana’s residents. John and his psychotic daughter Beth (who’s like Marjorie Taylor Greene born into a wealthy family) are supposed to be the heroes of “Yellowstone,” and yet they’ve spent most of the last several seasons doing everything in their power to screw up deals that would make them a ton of money. How relatable…
11. Ser Otto Hightower (Rhys Ifans) on “House of the Dragon”…The “Game of Thrones” universe has had loads of self-serving advisors, but Otto is the first one that’s been strangely boring. Unlike the mesmerizing, layered maliciousness of Littlefinger or the intriguing ambiguity of Varys, Otto is relatively transparent–even the naive King Viserys can see Otto’s agenda, demoting him once…yet inexplicably bringing him back after his successor Hand meets with a suspicious death–and, consequently, a little dull. He doesn’t crack a smile the entire first season, and his straightforward-scheming begins to feel a little monotonous.
10. Queen Elizabeth (Imelda Staunton) on “The Crown”…One of the central problems of “The Crown” is that it’s too reverent towards Queen Elizabeth to portray as anything but a rather boring character–especially since Claire Foy’s departure. This is the woman who presided over the implosion of the British empire (India, Israel, Nigeria, Canada, Australia, and a few dozen other countries gained independence on her watch) but “Crown” treats these as mere annoyances in the way of whether or not the royal yacht gets refurbished. The end result is a historical figure who doesn’t really do anything, and seems to have a disdain for those that do. That problem becomes especially obvious in season 5 with Prince Charles (the effortlessly watchable Dominic West) waiting in the wings to take over from a Queen who barely seems to do anything but make pursed, dissatisfied lips as a reaction to nearly everything.
9. Richie (Elon Moss-Bachrach) on “The Bear”…In the season finale, we do eventually feel sorry for the pitiable Richie, a relic of a jerkier time who hasn’t seen good news in ages. But for the large majority of the season, Ricky just comes off as an aggravating asshole. Richie is someone who makes even simple tasks difficult, and has nothing but bellicose putdowns for anyone trying to turn “his” restaurant into a functioning, profitable enterprise. If you’re a fan of characters who scream all their lines, you’ll probably love Richie, but everyone else will have to turn down the volume whenever he’s on-screen.
8. Javier (Alfonso Herrera) on “Ozark”...Many would probably put “Javi” in their top spot, but at least his character is supposed to be annoying as hell. Yet we’ve seen loads of villains over the years on “Ozark,” and none of them made me cringe whenever they’re on-screen (Javier is both an idiot and a snob, and his every inflection oozes with condescending stupidity). When “Javi” is killed, I literally clapped.
7. Jude (Chai Hansen) on “Night Sky”…In contrast to Javi (or even Richie), we’re supposed to like Jude. But I found him unbelievably tedious, overly cryptic (even dishonest with his gracious hosts), and most of his scenes unnecessary time fillers (he’s only loosely connected to the other planet that we actually do care about). As an experiment, I believe you could fast forward through most of his scenes and not miss much of the overall show even though he connects the cult plot line to the quiet elderly couple with an interplanetary gateway in their shed (Sissy Spacek and J.K. Simmons). There are so many enticing elements to “Night Sky” that you keep wondering why the series never fully gels–and I believe much of the blame lies with Jude’s character.
6. Rebekah Neumann (Anne Hathaway) on “WeCrashed”…It’s been odd to see years of Karen memes finally call attention to obnoxiously privileged, self-absorbed white female behavior and then see media that continues to celebrate it get critical praise. One such case could be Hathaway’s heralded performance as Rebekah Neumann, a woman who doesn’t appear to see a world beyond her own eccentricities and wants. Rebekah is the nightmare nepotism-beneficiary that runs so many schools or businesses, as she fires her husband’s employees for even the tiniest missteps (like not respecting her “Vegan workplace” initiative), and continuing to insist she plays a much bigger role in someone else’s success than seems evident. From what we see of Rebekah, she contributes very little to WeWork except demands that cater mostly to her own ego. This wouldn’t necessarily make a bad character except the series appears clinically-unable to portray her as unsympathetic or as someone who’s gone from a rich, adoring dad to a rich, indulgent husband with minimal friction.
5. Kofun (Archie Madekwe) on “See”…This character isn’t supposed to annoy us at all, making him one of the year’s most unintentionally grating characters. Kofun is an idiot. Kofun spends most of his screen time pouting about dumb things. Kofun says and does things that seem designed to irritate the hell out of the audience (like routinely-yet-unintentionally helping “See”‘s primary villain or deciding he should blind himself in the series finale). Kofun is allegedly one of the protagonists who audiences should be rooting for, but I think they could teach his character in screenwriting classes as a fine example of what you shouldn’t do.
4. Prince Edmund (Louis Davison) on “Vikings: Valhalla”…Edmund inherits lots of bad feelings many watchers of the original “Vikings” might’ve had for the scheming British royals who seemed pathologically incapable of sticking to a deal with the invading vikings. After a definitive defeat, the still-scheming Edmund seems snotty when he should be grateful he’s alive, and his death becomes one of the most satisfying aspects of this new series, finally ending the line that’s given our viking protagonists so much trouble.
3. Zoe (Amy Brenneman) on “The Old Man”…A classic example of a completely unnecessary character that sucks up screen time like a vacuum cleaner. Brenneman is a talented actress, but not even she could overcome the energy-blackhole that is Zoe, a divorcee who has a never-ending date with Jeff Bridges’s character, and hangs around to pad the runtime of every episode with melancholy (and tedious) musings about her failed marriage, her son, the nature of trust, and whatever else seems irrelevant to what’s going on around her. The series creator said Zoe would return in season 2, which was some of the most unwelcome TV news of 2022.
2. Tommy Lee (Sebastian Stan) on “Pam & Tommy”…I think Stan’s performance is actually pretty good here, as he’s essentially asked to play a rock star’s Id incarnate. Tommy Lee enters nearly every scene with “balls to the wall” energy and arrogant bravado. Going into “Pam & Tommy,” I assumed I would feel sorry for Tommy Lee and Pamela Anderson (an excellent Lily James), but I wound up feeling worse for Seth Rogen’s cheated laborer. The entire catalyst for Rogen stealing the sex tape comes after Tommy Lee completely screws him over for owed wages, an act so despicable you might be surprised to find yourself rooting for Rogen. That’s probably not the feeling we’re supposed to take away from this limited series, and I think much of that could be contributed to Tommy’s one-dimensional bastard persona.
The Worst: Edward (David Oyelowo) on “The Girl Before”…There are many reasons that “Before” sucks (making it the rare show on this list that I actually don’t think is worth watching at all): an obvious interracial bashing that makes the killer easy to guess in the first few minute; a psychological ickiness to what’s being asked of its female characters without fully evolving into the horror piece it was meant to be; and a refusal to acknowledge how manipulative and villainous Oyelowo’s character actually is. I think Edward is at the root of most of these problems, as the series never quite abandons the notion that this icy control-freak is actually a misunderstood romantic.
Even towards the end, when it’s obvious he’s manipulated various women into changing the course of their lives (like breaking up one couple so he could date the woman only so she could be a psychological stand-in for a lost love–then discarding her when she “disappoints” him), the limited series doesn’t necessarily think it’s gross the way he ousts these women the second they assert the mildest individuality. Edward could’ve been a Dickensian villain or a commentary on the gradual oppression of modern tech culture, but the limited series hasn’t the true understanding to allow for that.