Petty Issues: Tagg Romney, Candy Crowley, Iran’s “Reviews” of Argo, and Glenn Beck’s Jeans

At the second presidential debate, Candy Crowley accurately called Mitt Romney out for lying his ass off about Libya, and of course the rightwing jumped all over her for, gasp, being a woman who opens her mouth—-I mean, being a moderator who injects truth into things. I think there needs to be more of this. If a candidate is lying, say so, call Romney/Ryan out for disgustingly politicizing Libya, admit there was no cover-up, and move on. Of course, that would require Romney to find something else in Obama’s foreign policy record that doesn’t work, and that’s nearly impossible.

Apparently Ashton Kutcher is now the highest paid man in television thanks to his extremely lucrative deal for Two and a Half Men. In coincidental news, people with good taste form a mass suicide watch.

Iran’s early reviews are in for the new Iranian-revolution-hostage drama Argo, and they are good! I’m kidding, all the state news agencies shit on the film as a pack of lies, even saying that the movie is a “flop” at the box office (it’s not) and that it only did moderately well (which in itself contradicts the notion that it was a flop) because the filmmakers bought massive blocks of tickets and gave them away for free to bums on the street. You got to love Iran’s “facts,” they could work for the Romney campaign. Speaking of which…

Runner-Up Asshole of the Week: Tagg Romney (one of Mitt’s 15 creepy sons) said that he wanted to slug President Obama at the last debate…What fucking planet are these guys living on where you can just knock out the president of the United States? I know Mormons think they’re generally better than anyone with dark skin, but Tagg Romney ain’t shit compared to the leader of the free world.

Asshole of the Week: Glenn Beck. This week he announced he was rolling out a label of jeans that cost $130 a pair…That’s right, because if anything screams high fashion, it’s Glenn Beck. He said he did it to combat the “socialist” Levi’s jeans (apparently he doesn’t like their commercials…or low price point). I’m starting to feel like “socialist” just means “not rich” today, and is being used to make rich people feel less guilty.