This is a sequel to (arguably) the worst Adam Sandler comedy ever, had a trailer that seemed to be even less promising, and is my pick for the least anticipated movie of the summer. To say I was going into this one with high hopes would have Pinocchio calling me a lying sack of shit.
What Works: [crickets]…I liked some of the gratuitous T & A (that other critics, perhaps rightly loathe) like the bikini girls who aren’t even given names, the car wash cheerleaders, and the walking aphrodisiac that is Salma Hayek, who maintains her bombshell image even into her forties. On a visceral level that satisfies more than any of the comedy does, although I do have to give points to the always-game Andy Samberg for showing up as a male car wash cheerleader. His willingness to go for broke is something the older, complacent comedians could have desperately used.
What Doesn’t Work: This movie really, really sucks. There’s all the main reasons (lame plot, uninspired execution, lazy jokes that don’t really care if they turn into laughs, a braying Adam Sandler performance) but there’s something working its way into the mix here that even the terrible first movie didn’t have: a whole-sale fake moral lesson. The first film hinted at the idea that a “simpler life away from technology” would have been better than kids with Iphones (because our economy runs on adults that had serious tire-swing skills when they were kids) and that pandered to adults who like to say “kids should go play outside” even if they don’t know why. This film goes one step further by having all the families move out of the city and back to their small hometown to “give their kids a better life.” This feels like red meat for the people that never left their small towns, and not something Sandler (who’s from NYC) would ever really do or even believes in. The posturing adds a layer of faux-sermonizing that doesn’t exactly help the smug cast or worthless script go down any easier. And even though The Internship was no prize (also starring similarly lazy, aging comedians) it at least made an effort to acknowledge the world we live in and what might be useful to learn in it, Grown-Ups 2 has no aspirations whatsoever so no wonder it’s a hit.
What I Would Have Done Differently: I don’t think ANYONE can make an argument that Grown Ups needed a sequel except maybe the people who got paid to star in it. The fact that their avarice was rewarded with a 40 million dollar opening weekend gross is shameful.