I’ve now seen all the original series that Netflix has produced and that’s no small feat when we’re talking about suffering through 13 hours of a real piece of garbage like Hemlock Grove. Below, the good, the bad, and the ugly of Netflix…
5. Hemlock Grove…The worst show they’ve produced and (in my opinion) their only real bomb. This show is set in a Pennsylvania town with a werewolf on the loose and teenage girls dropping like flies. Of course, it wouldn’t be a modern fantasy show if it didn’t get tricked up in an overly elaborate, confusing mythology that is more trouble to figure out than its worth. By the end of the first 13 episodes, we’ve been subjected to something or other at a laboratory, an angel, and man-made monsters. It’s all a little ambitious for a show that features piss-poor acting (even the usually fine Famke Janssen gets lost in an inconsistent accent that snaps back and forth between faux-British and faux-American), horrid dialogue, and sloppy pacing. The best parts of the first season are the ultra-disgusting transformations between man and werewolf (it only happens two or three times though) because the show is finally alive. I also enjoyed looking at the beautiful face of Kandyse McClure as some sort of supernatural investigator but [spoiler alert] she gets killed and won’t be in the second season, if there is one…Grade for First Season: D
4. Lillehammer…This occasionally charming but low-key series was actually Netflix’s first series and it’s not exactly the splashiest debut they could have gone with. It’s basically a fish out of water story about a New York mobster (Steven Van Zandt or The Sopranos’s Silvio as he’s more commonly known) going into witness protection and being relocated to Lillehammer, Norway. Why? Because he liked the Winter Olympics that were held there and because “nobody but nobody is going to be looking for me in fucking Norway.” Well, sure enough, he’s proven wrong when some Italian goons eventually stumble onto his scent, but in the meantime the best aspects of this quiet show are watching Van Zandt build his criminal empire in the backwoods of Norway and shaking down the local bureaucrats there who are, in every way, Norway’s version of gangsters. Grade for first season: B
3. House of Cards…I’ve already reviewed this show before but it’s worth repeating now that it’s gotten so much attention from its major Emmy nominations. I really like this show, but I don’t love it and I should. The main thing keeping me is that Francis Urquhart (Kevin Spacey’s ruthless politician) isn’t nearly as dynamic a character as he should be. He’s charmingly amoral and fun to watch, but there aren’t enough layers and we never properly understand his motivations. Yes, he wants power and revenge at the system holding him back, but since he believes in absolutely nothing (his most despicable acts include strong arming his own party and teacher’s unions…despite being a Democrat) it’s hard to fathom what’s driving him to such elaborate measures. Plus, the show gets awfully bogged down in nowhere-bound subplots involving his frosty wife Clare (an overly dry and ambiguous Robin Wright). I loved Corey Stoll as a drunken, vulnerable congressman and the plotting is sure-footed, but this show isn’t quite great…yet. Looking forward to season 2 though. Grade for the first season: B+
2. Orange is the New Black…See my review for this the Monday before yesterday, but it’s very, very good. The most humane and curious prison show I’ve ever seen. I really felt like every one of these characters could be real people, and it’s the rare show that’s big-hearted enough to even let its villains have layers (a lovesick and desperate corrupt prison guard, a royally screwed up Jesus freak, and a maternal Russian mob wife). Plus, if you want to know how people wind up in prison——-and what their lives are like once they get there———this might be as close as you can get. Give it a few episodes and I think you’ll be pulled in. Grade for the first season: A-
1. Arrested Development…I gave an impassioned defense of this show’s 4th season (the first to appear first on Netflix) yesterday. It’s 4th season was the most ambitious to date, building the jokes in each episode until the entire season resembled a comedy Rubic’s Cube. [Gob’s episodes and arc as the driver for a Hollywood entourage may be the funniest.] Finally, we reach a mix of murder-mystery, father vs. son romantic duels, the fastest stream of jokes around, and a climactic Cinco de Quatro bash set to a horrid musical of the Fantastic Four. This season is (in my humble opinion) the trickiest thing they could have done, and it works, despite the objections of some “fans.” Respect must be paid. Grade for the Fourth season: A